How to Talk to Your Kids About Porn
With internet use steadily increasing among both kids and adults, never has it been so important to talk to your kids about internet pornography. The truth is, in this modern age, internet pornography is both instant and invasive. Today, kids are being bombarded with sexual messages through videos, movies, and music. No longer can we expect that our kids will not be exposed to pornography. The statistics are startling:
According to TopTenreviews.com the average age of first internet porn exposure is 11 years old.
The Crimes against Children Research Center says that 1 in 5 teenagers have received a sexual solicitation via the web.
According to LDSLiving.com “79 percent of young people’s unwanted exposure to pornography occurs in the home.”
One out of 7 kids have received a solicitation of porn and there are 100K websites that offer illegal child pornography.
Unfortunately, however, only about 25 percent of the youth who encountered a sexual approach or solicitation told a parent (Crimes against Children Research Center). As parents, therefore, it is our duty to educate our children on the biblical view of sex as a powerful ritual used to bring about emotional, physical, and spiritual intimacy between partners.
But why are kids watching pornography?
Children view porn out of curiosity and use it to gain knowledge about sex
Children use porn because it feels good
Children use porn as a way to deal with stress and difficult emotions.
Children use porn to feel a sense of freedom and to test boundaries
For adolescents, in particular, coming across pornographic content may generate the most intense excitement they have ever experienced due to their brain’s release of dopamine, oxytocin, adrenaline, and other pleasure-creating hormones. One teenager explained it this way when describing why he started using porn at age 11 after seeing it the first time:
“I wanted to get the same feeling again that I got the first time, which was a feeling of excitement and almost a joy—but not a real joy… like when you’re on a rollercoaster”
So how do we use this information?
Teach children about sex early, and make your family the safest place to talk about it.
Tone matters. Be calm, confident, and clear.
Share your values around sex; stress the importance of meaningful, respectful relationships, and that pornography is an unrealistic representation of true intimacy.